The First Day of the Week

StormCroppedVER2

Today is Sunday, the beginning of the week.  How do you spend your Sunday’s?

When I was growing up we still had the “Blue Law” in Texas, meaning most places were closed on Sunday’s.  I remember working at the bookstore when they did away with the “Blue Law” and everyone saying that it was a mistake to do away with it, it wouldn’t last because people liked having their Sunday’s off.  Guess what? People like convenience more.  What was gained by doing away with the “Blue Law?”  Not a lot, it did make it where you could go to the mall on Saturday or Sunday, but as far as the retailers went it meant sales on Saturday were split between Saturday and Sunday.  It also meant the managers had to find people to work on Sunday and pay an extra day’s wages with no significant increase in revenue.

How many times do we do something for convenience sake, find out it didn’t have the big impact we thought it would, might not even be that beneficial, but we keep doing it because we tell ourselves we “should,” it’s the way things are done now?  There have been times when I was thankful a store was open on Sunday, but very rarely.  For the most part, we spend time at home, at the park, and at church.

I remember Sunday’s as being a day to go to church, spend time with family and friends, eat a big meal then go home and take a nap.  It was also a day to prepare for the week.  Saturday we caught up on yard and house work, laundry, and clean up.  Sunday we laid out clothes and planned for the week.  I even remember mom working out menus for meals so we knew what we were going to eat each day.

Now days Sunday is still a day of rest for my family.  We go to church Sunday morning, spend time with family and friends, eat a meal and sometimes even work in a nap.  I finish laundry and set my calendar for the week, fine tune the “to do” lists to make the most of the coming days and make sure things don’t fall through the cracks and important events aren’t overlooked.

Setting the pace for the week is important.  A day of rest, a good attitude, and a good outlook can make all the difference in how your week goes.  Time is too precious to waste.  It only takes a moment to get things in order and make a difference.  When you take the time to plan ahead things tend to flow better and be less stressful, and isn’t it great to find ways to make things less stressful!

 Cherry Coley (c)

Grief and Birthdays

If there is one thing I have come to realize the last few weeks it’s that grief is completely unpredictable, and that it will not be ignored.  You will not skip by it, you will not just put it off until later, you will get doubled over and knocked down, and then struggle to keep some sort of composure as you muddle through the day.

 I have just been sort of going through the motions the last few days, putting one foot in front of the other and acting like everything is fine.  It’s not fine; it doesn’t seem real at all.  At least 4-5 times I started up the road and thought, “I have to call mom,” then would remember that she’s not there to call.  Then my mind would do this weird flip flop of trying to reject that fact and act like it was all just a bad dream.  If only we lived in soap opera land that might be true.  Then again, I’m not one to stand around plotting and worrying all day. 

 Somehow I just didn’t plan for this rollercoaster, and feel like I should have seen it coming, I should have anticipated or something.  You see, my birthday is tomorrow.  It’s never been that big of a deal for any of us.  We don’t go way out of the way, or celebrate for weeks or a month, or anything like that.  I am not really sure why, we just never have. 

 Yet, every year my mom would call me at 5 minutes until 5 o’clock and say, “Well, it’s about time you woke up!  (insert year)’s ago you kept me up all night long waiting for you to get here!  Happy Birthday!”  Then later on we would meet up and she would have made a cake and have written out a card.  It didn’t hit me until this weekend that I wouldn’t hear that message that used to make me smile and roll my eyes at the same time. 

 This last Saturday, my oldest daughter went to her Senior Prom.  She was simply beautiful, so very grown up looking in her dress with her boyfriend by her side.  I had to work so I wasn’t sure I would get to see them before they went to Prom, but they waited and made a special trip to come back by the house so I could snap a few pictures.  It was a bittersweet moment, I am so amazed at how much she’s matured and has really grown into a wonderful person, I was nailed again thinking how my parents would have loved to see her all dressed up.

 My youngest daughter went to a friend’s house to stay so it was just me, the dog, the cat and boxes of stuff to go through.  I was at a really low moment on Saturday, and just let myself cry for a while, talking to my mom as is she was there with me in the room.  At one point I asked, “Why, Mom, Why did you leave?  Why aren’t you here now?”    It was then I looked in the drawer of a cabinet, and found an envelope. 

 I turned the envelope over and pulled out a birthday card from my mom.  There was no date on it, but I know it must’ve been one from the last few years.  There she had written “Happy Birthday, Cherry.  If wishes were dollars, we’d both be rich.  I have so many wonderful wishes for you, and in the end, it’s the thoughts and wishes that count the most anyway.  Love, Mom”

 Thanks, Mom, you have NO idea how much I needed that!  Then again, maybe you do.

 Cherry Coley ©

 

Fuzzy Socks and Movie Night

fuzzy socks!!

As mom’s we are usually busy doing something all the time, it just comes with the territory.  Rarely do you see a mom just doing one thing at a time, and even if she is you can bet her mind is doing some kind of mental checklist of all the other things she needs to be doing or that she has to work on next.  Somehow we are programmed to multi-task at warp speed and even feel somewhat guilty if we have moments where we aren’t doing this.

At work today another single mom was stating that she had Saturday night at home all to herself and she really enjoyed just being able to watch a movie.  Out of curiosity I asked, “but did you REALLY just sit and watch it, or did you get up and start doing stuff around the house?” She laughed and admitted she also straightened the room, did some laundry, and other things that needed to be done, BUT she listened to every word of the movie.   Before long we were all talking about how we weren’t really accustomed to sitting through a movie, it’s just something we don’t normally do, unless someone else is there and we are expected too, but when we are by ourselves or it’s just us and the kids, you can bet we are still up and doing all the other things that need to be done at the same time.

This to me explains why in a day of streaming movies, TEVO and CD’s readily available at any time, movie theatres are still in existence.  We mom’s still like to go out to the occasional movie because in a movie theatre there’s no choice; you just sit back, relax and enjoy the movie.  Unless, of course you have a toddler, then it’s family friendly movies only and time in the restroom for mom, but that’s a whole other subject. 

So the next time you are on Face Book or Twitter and you see a mom posting about having a night of peace and quiet to sit home, you can bet she’ll do something nice for herself, but she’ll also be happily listening in to a movie or cranking up her favorite tunes and catching up on all the other little things that need to be done around the house, it’s just the way we are.  We do still enjoy the alone time now and then though. 

Cherry Coley ©